Or…Mo’ Better Rachée. (I really wanted to use that title)
So.
A fellow blogger, Liz, wrote a post sharing ten things we didn’t know about her. After giggling through her post I totes agreed with ANOTHER blogger, Hillary, when she suggested we do a ten things link up. Then Liz said we would and I got kinda nervous because I think I’ve told y’all everything there was to know about me. Sorta cause there are some things that I am STILL not ready to share.
So, here are ten more (semi superfluous) things about me. (Originally I couldn’t think of ten and only had nine but then I thought of ten but y’all best know that this was really tough because a few weeks ago I shared a five things about me video on my about me page. (Go view it now. It’s at the bottom of the page. I’ll wait.)
Anywhoodle:
1. When I was a kid I wanted to grow up to have six kids. Among the names I had chosen for those poor unfortunate souls:
Emilee Diamond
Unique Zenith
Tiger Lily Rose
Benjamin Maximilian
Harrison Jefferson.
What was I on? I mean, wanting six kids and all!
2. Liz wrote about the no swimsuit period…I had a no outside in the summer period. For a good two years I had this weird thing where I wouldn’t go outside during the summer. It was, wait for it, me thinking I was fat. Looking back, while yes, there were some mushy parts that shook a little more when I walked it is nothing like the disaster that is my body today. This is not a self deprecating thing but I am mushy in lots of places. Thar I blow!
3. I hate, absolutely HATE my middle name. I didn’t tell my ex husband until about a year or so in and Effin Guy still doesn’t know it (maybe he does and just can’t remember it).
4. I used to have a crush on Gopher from Love Boat. And the Fonz (God Help Me). And Theo from the Cosby Show. Of course Gopher looks like this, Fonzie looks like this and Theo looks like a really good friend of mine so it’s kind of icky but back in the day….(starry moony eyes).
5. I hate gardening. I *think* I should garden because I have a piece of a patch of something in front of my house but yeah. It looks a hot mess and I’m not entirely upset about the prospect of paving it over and having a patio. That I probably won’t use because then I’ll be all complaining about not having a garden. (I know, right?)
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| Don’t you wish your girlfriend was hot like me? |
6. I rocked a Jheri Curl well into my second year of college (the first time around I mean). And no, you couldn’t tell me anything honey! My hair may have been dripping and disgusting but it was bouncing and kinda behaving and I could put it in a ponytail.
7. In spite of being a reasonably intelligent woman, there is a (huge) part of me that thinks that The Planet of the Apes movies and The Matrix movies are based in some fact and are glimpses into the future. Seriously, yo! People think it’s cute to put monkeys, apes, gibbons, whatever in clothes and teach them sign language. Keep playing and you’ll wind up like Maurice Evans. Also, why are we so dependent on machines? I do worship at the alter of Apple, and Sony and HP and am just as guilty but say what you will about the Wachowski bothers; those dues know some things. I saw The Animatrix. That robot went nuts and killed that family. Then they all went nuts and took over. HmmmMmmmm.
Think about it.
8. I hate being the fat twin. My poor sister carried this title for a good bit of our lives and now that I am taking a walk in her shoes it sucks monkey balls. I think being described as “a little chubbier” is quite sh*tty and to the person who thinks that is an appropriate description…tighten your weave.
Also, sorry Buffy for not telling people to F*ck Off when they would describe you as “having a fuller face.”
9. As a kid I was attacked by a dog and as an adult I don’t like dog slobber so I always tell people I’m afraid of dogs. Dumb to pull a Tina Cohen-Cheng but why do dogs think it’s OK to lick you in the face, mouth and just violate the personal space rules? No thank you Fluffy. Stay out of my crotch.
10. I think about religion from time to time but really don’t want to be “that woman” heading to church, fat, single, dragging her kid along. Me wearing some ill fitting dress or suit sporting elephant ankles cause I’ve stuffed my feet into some high heeled shoes that I have no business wearing and really don’t match my outfit and my poor kid having to serve in some type of youth ministry. I don’t want to hear the “I told you so’s” from some of the Super-Christian-Bible-Thumping-Holy-Rolling-Churchier folk I know and honestly, I just don’t want to make that commitment. I know when the rapture comes I’ll be among the ones left behind but right now if it comes on a Sunday I’ll be sleeping in. (That has got to be the most blasphemous thing I’ve written!)
With that, that’s ten mo’ about me. What about you?
What do I need to know? Share in the comments or link up with Liz!
-r
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