On why dating is like looking for a job.
This is not to say that a relationship is work (painfully rolling my eyes) but dating is like looking for a job. Don’t believe me? I’ve asked some of my employment challenged friends how their job searches are going and the answers they share sound suspiciously like something I would say when asked if there is a special dude in my life.
Online, in person, whatever. The word is spread that you are looking.
Casually you may mention it to a friend who has just waxed excitedly about what she and Mr. Man did the night before, your tone full of envy yet happy for her happiness. Your family, well intentioned we hope, may suggest that the doctor that just examined her/him is FINE and that hey, you once worked in a hospital and may have something in common right? Someone keeps poking you on Facebook (which, in my humble opinion) is like playing tag at recess.
You’ve met him* and now you have to find out if he is the one for you. Dating is hard in this cyber age! There are tons of ways to scope out a dude before you have even spoken with him! You chat on the phone, online, through e-mails. There are text or Instant Message or e-mail or write on your wall (if you Facebook). Oh yes! I can call you too. Cell, home, work, blah, blah, blah! And still not be sure if this is it.
Now it’s time for the date. You dress to impress, hair did, clothes right. And as you eat you make polite conversation about general topics just beyond the small talk range but close enough to it so as not to offend.
Same as the first, a little bit louder and little bit worse!
Seriously, you go out on another date because you clicked. Talk is still light but a bit more personal. You can relax a wee bit more because you realize that there is a reason to get your hope up. Do you seal the deal with a kiss**, hug, more?
Now if, like your blogger, you are a Black Woman, you are ecstatic that you HAVE a date considering the dire news that keeps floating around about the lack of mates for Black women. Don’t settle cause the news isn’t that bad. Its a trip but there is hope. You’ll have to kiss a bunch of frogs before you find your prince. Remember this because all that glitters may not be gold.
Once you land dude, you relax and, if you are me, you can release a little of the crazy. Just a little cause it’s bubbling under the surface waiting to unleash it’s ugly head.
I see you reading this with a smirk. Don’t judge me!
Off my soapbox. Got some things brewing and that’s all I care to share for now. I need to look for some shoes that will make me look awesome.
Updating my resume,
*I’m guessing this could also apply to men but fellows let a sister know if she is wrong please!
** I’m hot to trot so this is for other people. Kidding…some!