Alter Ego

So.
The post I had written for today was deemed a tad too personal. In hindsight, I am glad I gave myself a day or so to re-read what I wrote and re-think posting it. You see I am still under the delusion that my blog ego is anonymous and that other than the people I harass, er ask to read what I write, no one knows who I am.
Yeah.
I have dual citizenship on planets Reality and Fantasy land.

Anywho, I wanted to share that I have been in a foul mood for the last few days weeks.

That in itself is not bad. It’s some other the other things I had decided I was going to share that, once again, upon rethinking and asking for advice, I deemed it a tad personal.

But back to my foul mood.

It’s colored my relationship with my mom, my daughter, my work, and myself. I really wish I could pin point a reason but I am just feeling like quite the witch.

[major eye roll and teeth suck]

I really don’t like feeling like this.

It’s a mixture of the blues, the blahs and the Immaeffyouups.

Yeah.

It’s like that.

In the past I would have gotten rid of my mood with self destructive behavior including, but not limited too, Haagen Daaz, Breyers and chocolate. This time I chose a different tactic: I talked. A little.

It’s difficult to change who you are. I am a little tea pot: short and stout. When I get all steamed up hear me shout.

But this time when I felt myself steaming up I was able to catch myself and change the direction that I was moving.

You know what?

It was great.

I didn’t blow up, blow my diet or blow my top. I merely allowed the emotions to flow and have been making strides to work through my negative feelings. I have worked on reconnecting with my mom, The Bee and myself (the last one is a trip!). It has been a difficult journey but I have used some of my new tools to change the way I am.

Taking a page from fellow blogger Tabby (I Choose Bliss) I have decided that instead of being SO negative, contrary and pessimistic, I am going to be a lighter spirit. Tabby is such a phenomenal woman (hear her roar) positive, upbeat, and optimistic. She seems like such a genuine person and so pleasant.

Don’t get me wrong, I like my snark and sarcasm but I don’t like being such a Negative Nancy. I have been feeling like the hydrant for a few days and that sucks quarters. Eww!

So today I tell my bad mood to pack your crap and go. No notice, no warning, ya got to go and I am ready for a new me!
-r