It was a dreary day.
It was a hectic day.
It was a day of truth.
Today I weighed myself for the first time in months and boy oh boy! Denial is NOT a river in Egypt*. In order to perform this act of foolishness I locked myself into the bathroom and turned the water on, cause running water would obviously have some affect on the results. I kicked off my shoes, considered removing my clothes (jeans and the shirt I was wearing would surely add more weight, no?) and I bravely stepped on. While the dial danced back and forth I had a momentary glimmer of hope that my decision to publicly announce that I was fat and out of shape was a rash act but alas, the scale reflected what my pants have been telling me: in the last three months I have gained a good ten pounds.
What the !*@*&!
I am still not comfortable with you all knowing the exact number but let’s say I think I should be in some type of research study.
It gets worse.
I was winded during my story hour today, I had absolutely NO energy by 12 and I feel blah.
It could totally be hormonal; I know that time is near and it seems that the older I get the longer there are between the days when I am not feeling manic and when I am mellow.
This week I am looking at what I eat. And I eat a lot of crap. Convenient food, junk food, and it;s not pretty. I’m surprised that I haven’t been sick more.
Anywho, I am writing down everything I eat, from the pretzel I scarfed down on my way back to work to the Skittles that I munched on while watching TV to the creamers in my coffee. Day one was already tough. I forgot to log the food twice and was embarrassed writing what I ate.
Back to my notebook.
* I still don’t know what that means but I like the way it sounds.