Yesterday I attended a workshop that made me rethink all of the voices in my head. The voices that tell me no when my gut is screaming YES! YES! The voices that cause doubt and worry when I am am feeling confident and strong. The voice that always tell me that I am “just a” (Fill in your own blank)
I am someone’s mom, someone’s sister, someone’s friend. But I am so much more than that. It’s amazing to me how I, in tweets and facebook statueses, how I can say how awesome and great I am but when really called on showing my skills I bow my head and shyly declare that I’m OK, that I am ionly doing my jb that I am not as good as I really am. I worry that someone will look at me as boasting, that I am being conceited and full of myself and that I will screw it up and then the next time “they” will look at me and be all, “Mmm Hmmm!”
After being in that room full of women who were cheering me on, taking the accomplishments taht I merely sweep away as “what I’m sposed to be doing” and making me realize that I am not my nerves and that I am the HCIC and that it is totally OK to own it and be proud of it I decided that I am going to rock it, own it and carry my head high.
Confidence, not arrogance. I am not bragging when I share a win at work, a great day with my kid or that fab thing I made. I am not just a library chick, I am THE library chick. I may not have all of my degrees but dammit I make it work. I am not just The Bee’s mom, I am the mom who may not have it all right but dammit I do my best and she is growing to be a fine kid. I am not just a nothing, I am a leader in my community, I am smart, I am creative and for what it’s worth I am going to own it and be proud that I can do.
Not just a nothing anymore,
This was my “go girl!” 5 minute Stream of Consciousness Sunday post. It’s five minutes of your time and a brain dump. Want to try it? Here are the rules…
- Set a timer and write for 5 minutes.
- Write an intro to the post if you want but don’t edit the post. No proofreading or spellchecking. This is writing in the raw.
- Publish it somewhere. Anywhere. The back door to your blog if you want. But make it accessible.
- Add the Stream of Consciousness Sunday badge to your post.
- Link up your post to Fadra’s site.
- Visit your fellow bloggers and show some love.