Smile

It started with a movie. Sometimes these things start with TV or a song or even a book (I’m a library chick, gah) because yes, I am an unapologetic pop culture quoter but, in this case, it started with a movie. The Librarian and I were watching “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind” and this movie has been on my mind.

Quick plot recap: After a painful breakup, Clementine (Kate Winslet) undergoes a procedure to erase memories of her former boyfriend Joel (Jim Carrey) from her mind. When Joel discovers that Clementine is going to extremes to forget their relationship, he undergoes the same procedure and slowly begins to forget the woman that he loved. But then Joel decides that he doesn’t want to forget and goes through extremes to keep his memories. 

God knows a Lacuna, Inc would do so well if one popped up in the Philly area. My normal reaction to painful events I have experienced is to mourn the thing in what I think is internally (however I lash out at those who love me and even those who are near me) and then hide all traces of having experienced a thing away like it is something shameful. But yes, it would be so dope to have past relationships, slights against me, slights I’ve committed, those moments when I am not my absolute best and most comfortable, gone with some complicated head wiping method.

This Dr. Seuss quote keeps popping up: “Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened.” As much as I fuss about Seuss, I do love this quote. Instead of mourning the end of a thing, appreciate the experience. No, I am not suggesting that one should be grateful that you had to experience some toxic event or interact with a harmful person. I’m suggesting that instead of focusing on what is gone, focus on what is to be.

Yeah, I know that this is some hippy dippy talk but…don’t we learn from the past? Isn’t the person we are now a combination of experiences? And shouldn’t those uncomfortable moments inform this new version of us to help us make new experiences?

I don’t the answer for sure but for now I will take the bad with the good and smile.