“Missy. Can I come over?” “Missy. Can I sleep over?” “Missy. Can I go with you?”
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| picture courtesy of mrsrkfj |
The Bee loves her cousin, fiercely defends and protects him and often gives me grief for being so negative when he visits. I can’t help that his history has resulted in broken dishes, spilled soda, me cleaning up after him and a cat so wound up that she ran through the house for an hour after he left. But I have been considering my behavior. Dill is not yet double digits (although close enough) but he’s still a child and I would be up in arms if someone were to view The Bee with anything other than loving eyes. As I pondered how to get out of my own head a family with four boys ranging in age from 5 to 12 came to visit me today. As I chatted with Mom of Four she casually answered questions about what her family’s rest of summer plans were as her boys explored the library. She was calm as she turned to two who’s slap game escalated to an almost fight and asked two of them to stop hitting each other (they listened). Mom of four was downright serene when a third started complaining about the visit, she was patient as one boy took a car and drove it along the table, his arm, his brother’s arm. All the while making a zoom noise. At that moment it hit me…boys, will be boys. Dill is a boy. He will do boy things. So him tripping through the house. Him running, his business for being busy…that’s all what boys do.
Sigh!
I’m not giving him a pass for all behavior. This is just for the things that Rachee issues like him running everywhere, touching everything and just all over…Gah! Tomorrow when the question is asked, “Missy. Can I come over?” Instead of a quick, “NO!” I’ll consider and possibly answer with a (somewhat) enthusiastic Yup!
Acknowledging the Y chromosome,
-r
This post is a part of Shell Things Pour Your Heart Out Wednesdays
The rules:
Here are the Rules:
Write a post from the heart.
Something that has been weighing on you.
Something you feel passionately about.
Something you’ve been wanting to talk about.
A cause, a memory, a belief, a world view.
Anything.
*My inner Oscar the Grouch
Aww, my Pickles!
Rachee, I know exactly what you mean! I have that special little someone in my life who I think twice about having over myself. Now, I have a son, so I am very familiar with the Y chromosome phenomenon you describe. The problem is, I think this boy was given double or triple the normal amount of Y chromosomes. To top that, my son doesn’t like to play with him. But the boy is the son of my friend, a very lovely person, so I always invite him into my home, with my fingers tightly crossed that he will not break anything…this time. I cajole my son into accepting the boy into our home and “strongly encourage” him to be nice. I have seen a super-mean streak in him around this boy, and it is not a pretty sight. It isn’t easy, but I figure we have done the “right” thing by welcoming the boy into our home, and my son can learn an important lesson in tolerance.
It’s definitely not a pass for all behavior(says the mom of 3 boys) but I’ve become adjusted to what is normal boy behavior and what needs to be stopped.
You are a good aunt to know the difference between boy behavior and acting badly. Dill sounds like a boys boy, if that makes any sense! He will know your acceptance and love you for it. I know this as my own sister had lost several things to my children when they come over and tear through her house. They love her for it.
Aww, my Pickles!
It’s definitely not a pass for all behavior(says the mom of 3 boys) but I’ve become adjusted to what is normal boy behavior and what needs to be stopped.
YES. My first child was a girl. Life was good, life was fairly serene. When my son entered our world, it was like a wildfire. Suddenly the house was full of noise, and movement, and crashes.
Just like you, it took some time for me to adjust to a boy. And when I accepted him for who he is, BAM, eveything clicked into place. Thanks for sharing your story. Boys WILL be boys. And some boys are ALL boy!!!! Your Dill is adorably “all boy”.